Social networking on V-day
T.J. Rakitan
Issue date: 2/9/07 Section: Opinion
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Valentine's Day approaches. Known in some circles as "Singles Awareness Day," this particular holiday was the bane of my social existence from the third grade on up.
It all started when the idea sunk in that passing out little red-and-pink construction-paper cards to one's classmates is essentially pointless and, in a word, stupid. This realization, in turn, lead me to various acts of defiance such as the seven-years-running "Screw Valentine's Day" jam session and the poem to a friend in fifth grade that ran,"Roses are red / Violets are blue / Valentine's sucks / and so do you."
Even after the medium of exchange was upgraded from construction-paper hearts to various chocolate confections, I still didn't get the point. Boy, had I known then what I know now, I'd be telling a different story.
As kids, it's not necessarily clear to us that what our teachers are really having us do on Valentine's Day is participate in a loosely-coupled social network. Granted, I can't say most teachers I've known were aware of this either; nevertheless, the networks we create and in which we participate have the potential for infinite complexity and tantalizing payoffs.
Still, one aspect of these networks has been repeatedly rearing its ugly head in every conversation I've had with countless acquaintances about the "meet market" here at UPS: there's no dating culture here.
As an economics major, I hate to see such inefficiency in any market-but hell, when it comes to social exchange between the sexes (and I stress, social), the general consensus seems to be that we're running a trade deficit to compete with the Bush Administration. Perhaps some of our readers in the comparative sociology and psychology departments can shed more light on this than my own colleagues, but it often seems to me that the big problem is the wealth of current social mores that make it so hard to define what it means to go on a date.
For example, I might ask an eligible "other" out to coffee without the least intention of ever having anything come of it. What would we call this scenario? I, for one, haven't a clue.
It all started when the idea sunk in that passing out little red-and-pink construction-paper cards to one's classmates is essentially pointless and, in a word, stupid. This realization, in turn, lead me to various acts of defiance such as the seven-years-running "Screw Valentine's Day" jam session and the poem to a friend in fifth grade that ran,"Roses are red / Violets are blue / Valentine's sucks / and so do you."
Even after the medium of exchange was upgraded from construction-paper hearts to various chocolate confections, I still didn't get the point. Boy, had I known then what I know now, I'd be telling a different story.
As kids, it's not necessarily clear to us that what our teachers are really having us do on Valentine's Day is participate in a loosely-coupled social network. Granted, I can't say most teachers I've known were aware of this either; nevertheless, the networks we create and in which we participate have the potential for infinite complexity and tantalizing payoffs.
Still, one aspect of these networks has been repeatedly rearing its ugly head in every conversation I've had with countless acquaintances about the "meet market" here at UPS: there's no dating culture here.
As an economics major, I hate to see such inefficiency in any market-but hell, when it comes to social exchange between the sexes (and I stress, social), the general consensus seems to be that we're running a trade deficit to compete with the Bush Administration. Perhaps some of our readers in the comparative sociology and psychology departments can shed more light on this than my own colleagues, but it often seems to me that the big problem is the wealth of current social mores that make it so hard to define what it means to go on a date.
For example, I might ask an eligible "other" out to coffee without the least intention of ever having anything come of it. What would we call this scenario? I, for one, haven't a clue.
2008 Woodie Awards
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